Hear from Me…Jizarah Javeria

“….is it any wonder we have a television show called Are You Smarter than a Second Grader and a president that isn’t. I so miss a little dignity in American.”

Women’s rights in various religions: “It’s not just the Catholics, Orthodox Judaism segregate men and women in the synagogue. Girls have to sit in the back and they also don’t allow women to become rabbis. Islam…..forget about it…they don’t even let women show their faces…..Religion is a mean legacy. We cannot deny that religion is one place where we allow hate and oppression and discrimination to fester as it seeks safe haven in the Constitution…”

Oh…I have so much to say but don’t want this to be a three page blog. Do you recognize these lines? You do if you watch Boston Legal. It’s a good show if you get into those lawyer shows like I do. Boston Legal is a little different. The writers do make an obvious attempt to touch on topics that are truly happening now as well as express opinions they believe to be that of the general public.

The first quote was one of the lawyers talking about what he would want to see in the next United States President. I found the lines to be quite on point and couldn’t resist adding it to my blog.

I think we can all debate what we think health care or our foreign policy should be, but what about how the office of the Presidency is viewed by us and well everyone else around the world. Come on…we’ve had Clinton, we’ve had Bush. I think that says it all.

So how far should I take this topic? I mean, is it ok to say that Americans needs to get a grip on reality? …That the US is not really respected outside our borders, hmmm, even within our borders. Look at Myanmar. Really, they said no? They have been hit with one of the most devastating disasters and they refused US aid? What? Look, I’m not here to knock the US, but I am here to shed a little perspective. No matter what you think, what party you align yourself with, or what presidential candidate you currently support…do not overlook the power of being respected or NOT respected in this “flat” world. This one concept can affect a country’s economy as well as its safety. Ok enough said with that…well not enough, but…

Ok, on to the other lines…man oh man. If I had a dime for each dime I heard how unequally women are treated in Islam. Ok you Muslims out there….is that true? Are Muslim women required to cover their faces? Do these women feel like second class citizens? Do they feel inferior to the other gender? Ok, you non-Muslims out there. Yes…yes, yes and yes. There ARE women out there who are not treated fairly and their oppressors justify their behavior using their religion. Ugh…it’s disgusting.

Now, I too get tired of saying this old line…It’s not the religion, it’s the followers. Gosh I am personally so tired of repeating that.

When will that day come that our Muslim men smarten up? When will there be a time when our Muslim men pick up a Quran, read it, and learn to respect ALL the women in their lives? No, my friends, women do not have to cover their faces. Some may choose to do so but it is up to THEM. I know, I know. There are women who ARE forced to cover their faces. Don’t you know I know that? What can I do?

All I can do is help you guys understand that Muslim women (and men for that matter) have the right to choose! They are not subject to their spouse’s approval. So, now go tell someone else. Let people know once again as I’ve said in previous entries Islam is not about what you see on CNN, Headline News, or even the BBC. Islam is not what you see on movies or on TV shows. Islam is a beautiful way of life if you practice it with balance, tolerance, and obedience to God.

God is great!

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If your are interested in reading other blogs by other Muslim women, check out this blog Muslim Women.  There are a variety of authors on the blog covering all kinds of information.  It’s quite interesting…check it out.

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They are a lot of bad words out there. Some people can get a way with using bad language and it really doesn’t sound too bad. I mean it does, but it’s entertaining. Like Eddie Murphy and other comedians. It’s part of the joke..course there are other comedians like one of my favorites, Brian Reagan, who never uses foul language and they are STILL funny. So what about language on TV. Before you never head any bad language. Now, well, even cartoon shows like The Simpsons use language like “damn” or “ass”. It’s quite surprising, but maybe not that surprising. We all know we are almost at the point at anything goes on these shows. It is what it is.

We try pretty hard to shield certain things from the kids, but even when they are watching a kid’s show like “Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader”, up pops a commercial for those evening shows. And in the commercial they show clips of the upcoming episodes and they are quite explicit. So, you can’t even feel comfortable with your kid watching any show really.

Then there is the news. Kids can’t watch the news either. All they would hear about are sex offenders and murderers. And then there is the language on the news. Well, normally you could point out that the language used on the news is the best, the most articulate, most clear…um, but once in a while there is a slip up. Ask Sue Simmons. She dropped the “F” bomb on live TV. Yeah, in fact you can go to youtube to hear it….I was curious so I did. And yup, it’s pretty clear. She apologized of course. I don’t think it’s a big deal…she slipped and well, I’m sure it offended many. But she must have been mad at something and well, she made a mistake. It happens. There are so many other more offensive things on TV to complain about….

I could go on and on about the trash people talk about my religion. But instead, I will say, KUDOS!!! to The View. Today on the View they played a clip of some woman who said she would not vote for Obama because he is a Muslim. Well, he’s not and they told her that, but she doesn’t believe it. Well, the ladies on the View actually defended Muslims. They said that people refer to being Muslim as if it is such a bad thing. The one lady said that 99% of Muslims go out and do their job just like we do, and there are just some that don’t. Goldberg added that people forget there are radical Christians, radical Jews and she listed some other religions. It was actually nice to hear someone on TV explain that not all Muslims are what we see on CNN and Headline news.

Believe it or not…we are pretty nice people.

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I have three kids. I can’t say they are a lot of work.  They aren’t “work.”  I think as soon as you see your kids as “work”, you lose the fun of raising them.   I joke, we all joke, us moms that are not working but staying at home so we have more time for the kids…we joke that It’s a full time job or we should get paid for this job…but well. We shouldn’t get paid cause, well, it’s not a job.  Raising kids is fun activity that happens to last forever.  Yeah, it’s tough and challenging and all that, but it’s a lot of fun.  It would be fun to have more, but no, I’m done.  So, get this.  What if your youngest was 9 months and you were expecting your 18th kid the end of this year?  I know…crazy huh?  Well, ask the Duggar family.  That is exactly position they are in….read this.  Amazing huh?  They are all home schooled and all have names that start with “J”.

The mom says they are good things and bad things about having such a large family, but she seems pretty happy with their decision.  In fact, her husband was quoted saying that they want to have as many kids as they can.  Hmm, do you think his wife heard that? She talks about saying prayers with each kid each night, so I guess we can all speculate their religious affiliation.  It doesn’t matter though.  I mean, it’s just nice to know that these kids will probably be raised to behave pretty well as we have seen in other large families that I have also made the news.  Their parents probably set pretty good examples.  This is all speculation, but I bet you wouldn’t catch this mom with her butt showing like you work some others…huh?

Ok, let me explain.  So I was at my kids’ game last night.  My youngest wondered over to the playground as he is my daredevil who has no fear, I have to watch him pretty intently.  There was this mom sitting with her daughter playing in the sand that is all over.  Her shirt was short and her jeans were low.  Need I say more?  Ok, so some moms like to shop in the Juniors Section.  Ok, I have to admit that i am one of them.  I just don’t like the styles in the “ladies” section cause they are usually too business casual for me or just too blah.  So I like to see what is in the Juniors area, not to mention I’m short, so size is better for me there too. I also have to admit that I like the low risers.  Come on, three babies later, it’s nice to have some room for the belly to breathe :)  BUT, I’m also conscious about what shirts to wear with these jeans.  We women, I don’t care what you say, we can tell when we’ve got a little too much showing on top or bottom?  Come on, can you tell me that this mom didn’t know.  I guess there is a chance cause why would she sit so long with her butt hanging out? But it was so chilly, how could she NOT feel the breeze?  Someone explain this to me.  Same with women who wear low cut.  Man, I sound like I’m 80 huh?…”kids today.. what can you do?”  Women can tell they are showing something off even when they act dumb after you tell them.  Give me a break.

So 18 kids huh?  Power to them and God bless them.

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Remember when I talked about sports and how Pakistani girls aren’t really encouraged to play in any organized sports (especially at the high school level)?  Well, it’s not just Pakistani girls, it is Muslims all over the world.  You know there is so much I can talk about why as a Muslim woman, it is so very nice to live in the US.  See, I play soccer.  Well, when you put it like that, it sounds like I’m all that….but nope.  It’s just a league where a handful of us, all of which are 30+ moms except one play once a week.  You’d be amazed of the make up of the team:  a couple of Pakistanis, a converted American Muslim, Egyptians, Palestinian, and an Indian…it’s like being at a Middle Eastern grocery store with all these moms :)  The league includes about 8 or so other teams.  It is great fun, great exercise, allows us to have a break, and just awesome to hang out with moms of similar lives.  We play on a field in the open where ANYONE can come and they have.  We’ve had our husbands come out to watch along with our kids and other spectators.  But, we are lucky.

See there are women in Saudi Arabia who want exactly what we have here and are fighting hard for it even today, May 8, 2008.  I read this article, a must read.  It talks about a group of women who have put together a basketball team.  They are underground though.  Women in Saudi are not discouraged to play sports they are NOT ALLOWED.  Yes, they are not allowed and so they have to hide what they are doing.  They go to the gym with their abayas on and remove them to play.  They can do this since there are no men present.  Women are not allowed to practice in the same facilities as men.  They don’t have access to the same equipment.  They are not allowed to participate in the Olympics.  Since no one really knows about this team, nearby cities who also have teams don’t know about each other.  No one really comes to watch them play cause no one knows about them…you must read this article.  Simply put, it reinforces what liberties we Muslim women truly have living here in the US.

It is sometimes difficult to be Muslim here, but really, it’s all relative and with that perspective in mind, it’s very easy to change this point of view to, it’s easy to live here as a Muslim.  It’s tough to read that Muslim men do not treat their women equal.  They claim to be following Islam but it is not true.  If Islam preaches that women should not be able to drive on their own, that women should not have legal rights and that they should not play a sport…well I just wouldn’t be Muslim.  Kudos to you Muslim women… Lina al-Maeena and Norah Ashrur AND the other women of Jeddah United.

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It’s always fun to be a consumer when a company decides to make up for a mistake made by one of its employees.  This is the case with the northern Ohio Papa Johns.  They are offering 23 cent pizzas only today as the CAVs game is tonight.  So if you live around Youngstown or Cleveland enjoy!

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I guess some people would find it cute.  Not me.  Does that surprise you?  So why are there moms out there who intentionally talk loudly to their kids so everyone can hear?  Have you ever come across this?  You’re looking around a store and some mom a couple of aisle away walking with their kid…”Oh honey, I can’t buy that for you now, let’s go get something to eat first.” or “Why do you want to go now?  Let’s look for a little while longer and than we’ll go down to the play area.” or “Sweetie, mommy wants to look in the shoe section, let’s go there and then we can go meet grandma at 3pm.”  Is it just me or is it strange to hear this so unnecessarily loud?

Seriously, this happens all the time.  I was in a store today and the mom said to the kid “It seems to me that you need a nap.  Do you need a nap? No? You are behaving like maybe you need a nap.” Ok, so she’s just having a conversation with her little girl, but dude, I was pretty far away and heard everything she said. Am I being a little too picky or sensitive?  I don’t know..it just bugs me and so I just had to find out if anyone out there understands what I am talking about…or maybe you are the ‘loud child talker’ and so can explain to me why you need to have such preschool conversations so loud.  Just wondering…

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Do you ever have issues with emailing your digital photos because they are too large?  You have to download this Image Resizer application.  It allows you to, well resize your image.  It’s a fast download as well as install.  After the installation, all you will need to do is right click on the image(s) and choose resize picture.

This has been useful for photos I’ve been sending to other parents in my kids’ classes.  When I volunteer I take a bunch of photos of ALL the kids so parents who were not able to attend can see what happened in class.

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I love love love to watch movies…course I think I’ve already covered that in a past post.  Movies don’t usually inspire me.  I just really view them as entertainment.  Yet, now and then I’ll come across a movie that hits me in a certain way.  I saw 21 this past weekend.  Have you seen it or at least heard of the true story?  If you don’t want to know, then don’t read on, or at least just skip the next paragraph.  I for one don’t even like to watch a trailer.  Well, I’ll watch it to decide if I want to see it, but then after I’ve made a decision to go see it, I try to avoid watching the trailer again or a new one that may show even MORE scenes of the movie.  I guess I just like surprises.

21 is about an MIT grad who got into Harvard Med and is very troubled that he may not be able to attend Harvard just because he cannot afford it.  He gets introduced to this group of MIT students and one prof that go to Vegas to count cards in Blackjack.  At the end he gets caught but strikes a deal with his catchers to rat on the prof that recruited him into this mess.

So, this movie inspired me.  Wait, oops, don’t get me wrong.  I’m not inspired to learn how to play cards to then be able to win 300K at a handful of different casinos.  After all, as a Muslim I don’t believe in gambling.  Get this….there is a line in the movie where Kevin Spacey’s character says that the most important thing to do is to make decisions based on the system and not on emotions, because if you do, then you are now gambling.  Does that mean if I play based on a system it’s not really gambling?  lol

Anyways, it was, well, it was the MIT students’ brilliance that inspired me.  See, the main actor has a 4.00 GPA from MIT and just got into Harvard med.  He, along with the other students, demonstrate their intelligence in different ways throughout the movie.  That, my friends, is what inspired me.

On one hand it made me think that, man I’m not brilliant at all.  God willing, I hope my kids have a chance to work hard to have such a phenomenal mind.  On the other hand, this movie inspired me to become well, become smarter.  I know that sounds funny, but it made me feel like I need to learn more…gain new knowledge, expand on existing knowledge and obtain answers to my many unanswered questions.  Is that strange?  I mean, that I’ve been inspired in this way from just a movie?

I guess whether it’s a movie, a book, a person or a an experience…if something inspires you to become a better person, then why not?  So, now for my first “unanswered question” since my decision to pursue smartness - is that a word?:  How do I get smarter?  I have some ideas…I could read the entire Encyclopedia Britannica cover to cover as A. J. Jacobs has done in this really funny book I’m currently reading.  Naaaahh, he’s doing a pretty good job highlighting the best parts of the EB letter by letter.  Maybe I can go back to school.  Maybe take some night classes.  I’ve thought about that in the past, but I don’t want to spend my evenings away from my family just to take classes for the sake of taking classes.  Now if I were pursuing a degree of some sort, than maybe it would make sense.  Obtaining a degree, however, in addition to my BA is a commitment, one I’m not ready to make at this time.  So nope, that’s out.  How about reading?  I think that is a really good alternative.

I was never a big reader, even in college.  I read what I was suppose to, but only because I had to in order to make the grade.  I don’t really remember doing much reading for fun or reading something I wasn’t required to read.  I’ve definitely changed that.  Post college, I’ve been a two books a year kinda girl.  I started a lot of books, but never quite finished them.  Now, I read whenever I can.  I’m reading two books now, but I have another four already lined up.  I think it’s completely awesome to read while your kids are reading.  Try it!!! It’s a really good example to set.  I’ve also taken some lead from my kids.  On somewhat long car rides I’ve notice that both my kids grab books to read in the car.  Yeah, so now I do that too!

I’m not just about self-improvement as I’ve discussed before, but now i am ALSO about become more knowledgeable.  Although it drives me crazy to have a long list of shows recorded on my DVR, they’ll just have to sit and wait as I’m going to spend more time on reading then catching up on my shows.  Are you reading something now?  Send me a comment to let me know.

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